Thank you for taking the time to read my book and go through my life journey. You most likely have your own set of problems to solve and hurdles to overcome in your life. That’s why you wanted to read my book to find out how I dealt with them. You want to understand why you’re stuck in life, and I’ve shared my personal experience with you:
I failed twelve times in my first twelve love relationships. It’s not that I wasn’t attractive in between those relationships. After failing six times, I changed my appearance, switching to a nicer haircut and wearing more appropriate attire. Despite this, I continued to fail. I assumed next time would be better than my previous two relationships, but it did not end in marriage. What is the reason for this? I don’t want you to go through the same horrible experiences that I had. That is why I wrote this book to assist you in avoiding a similar disaster.
Why is it that your relationships are doomed to fail? Your partner may have other better choices because your qualities aren’t excellent enough, and you aren’t particularly attractive or wealthy. Perhaps your companion has better options and prefers other men. The ocean is full of fish. You wouldn’t be able to stop your partner from marrying her ideal man.
What options do you have in this situation? When your quality isn’t up to par, my advice in the book is to avoid being jealous and self-pitying. Don’t make negative remarks about others. Right now, all you need to do is focus on two words: continuous improvement.
What are the areas that you need to improve? First and foremost, I would advise you to enjoy life, make stronger connections with others, and demonstrate your positive side. Focus on the present moment rather than your competitors. If you are willing to enhance your career performance, expand your social networks, and improve your health and body shape, you will notice how different others regard you and see you from a different perspective.
Simultaneously, if your prospective life partner chooses between two people, you will have a much better chance of being selected. Because she’d see you’re a man who values self-improvement. You have the impression that progress is ongoing and that it is continuous. As a result, your girlfriend would be comfortable sticking with you. Staying with you, soon she becomes your spouse; she believes in you and will lead to a better future.
That’s what a responsible adult should do. Even though I am currently in a disadvantageous situation, this does not suggest that my future position would be the same. Perhaps I haven’t yet realised my full potential. Even though I may be stuck in my career today, I am confident that I will achieve greater things in the future. However, you must first demonstrate your potential before you can achieve your goals. You must show that you are capable of achieving great things in life. That is why self-improvement is critical, because your spouse may recognise your potential. She can detect your hidden talent. She can tell you’re a man who holds himself to a high standard. You are not a man who remains locked in the same position, unable to go forward.
When your partner has to choose one of the two men, your opponent may never improve. True, his qualities may be superior to yours at this time. Perhaps he is more attractive than you, but if you put up the effort to improve your personality, you may be able to close the gap. And, honestly, even if you aren’t as attractive as the other man, you can dress better. You can show that you are a man who is capable of making better decisions. You are handsome and charismatic at that time. Because your girlfriend may be interested in fashion, if you share her sense of style, she will classify you as part of the same group as her. She’d think of you as the kind of guy who can go out on dates. She would treat you as if you were the one with whom you might have a lengthy relationship. Yes, girls like you when they feel comfortable going out with you.
It makes no difference if your girlfriend does not choose you because you’re the boss and a true gentleman. You increase your social network as part of the continuous improvement process. You would meet various girls as your health and physical form changed. And these girls would begin to see you through a different lens. Not only will they treat you like regular pals, but they may also want to date you or even fall in love with you at first sight. Your self-improvement will enable you to progress to a greater level. You’d have more possibilities in life. So, even if your girlfriend chooses a different man, it hurts first, but it doesn’t matter. There is yet another option available to you.
Another reason the lady didn’t pick you up was that you were not ready. Maybe she wanted to test you or try you out. But then your attributes are just what she’s looking for in a man. Your tone, on the other hand, did not show confidence. You’re a follower rather than a leader. Ladies are not interested in staying with a subordinate. Therefore, learn to be a leader.
You may still fall in love or have a girl fall for you if you don’t step outside of your comfort zone and live a boring life. You must have something about you that she enjoys when she falls in love with you. “Love is blind,” as the cliché goes. Everything is pleasant and nice when Cupid strikes. She sees the best in you, and you see the best in her. This attraction is the most wonderful time of our lives. Both of them can’t live without the other, which is why they marry. However, only time will tell how long the bond between them will remain. The morning following the honeymoon is when the truth is revealed. After a few months of living together, reality sets in. The genuine self starts to show up. The couple begins to recognise each other’s flaws, weaknesses, and queer behaviour. Arguments erupt, and finger-pointing ensues; a verbal brawl is inevitable. Finally, the couple reaches for a truce in court, either through mediation or separation.
I am neither a dating nor a marriage specialist. I’m still seeking and attempting to find a suitable spouse. I learned after numerous failures. I became better. According to the motivational gurus, there is no failure, simply lessons learnt and experience gained.
People come in various shapes and sizes, and they have a variety of ideas and opinions. Often, we do not publicly communicate our inner feelings. We have something hidden deep within us. As a result, neither partner is unfamiliar with the other.
Do you value compatibility in your life? Or are you a fan of variety? Do you have an attribute that instantly attracted the opposite sex? Do you prefer a strong man or a strong woman in your life? Do you enjoy flirting with each other?
A man who is willing to speak up and tell the truth in public is appealing—a man who is willing to take risks. Your lady might believe you’re soft if you don’t show off your good characteristics. Your character is weak, not simply in a certain body component. She could foresee that you would try to avoid it if there was a confrontation and flee to a safer location. That is not at all what your girlfriend wants. She desires a true man who is capable of dealing with conflict. She is looking for a partner who enjoys going on adventures. She prefers a partner who is capable of handling challenging conversations and problem-solving.
Are you a man who appreciates it? That is why you have chosen to read this book to be inspired to become a better guy. As a result, don’t be worried that your lover will abandon you forever just because you misspoke one sentence. You must be able to flirt with your spouse in a lighthearted manner during your discussion. You must ignite a feeling of affection, as well as the atmosphere of a pleasant place. Incorporate humour, dispute, and challenges, like you would in public speaking.
Similarly, you must understand the power of flattery, or perhaps praises and compliments. This sort of verbal admiration has the magic to make your partner feel wonderful, as well as stand out from the crowd. It would be best to say the right thing at the right moment and in a friendly manner. Allow your lady to experience cloud nine. Don’t be too uninteresting.
Some men may be excessively playful. He is well-versed in the art of seduction. The girls are not naïve or stupid; they could see through the tricks of this person. They are hesitant to date this type of man. What’s the problem? Because he wasn’t taking responsibility for anything. Instead, you should make a deliberate effort to develop a life philosophy. To live in this world, you must know what your life mission is. You must convince your lady that she has a future with you. There is no reason to stay with you if there is no hope for a brighter future. If you’re insecure, you won’t be able to capture her heart if you can’t make her laugh. If you are strong, she cannot overlook your positive characteristics. Are you a man with ambition? Are you a goal-oriented man? Are you a man who can contribute to society’s values? These are crucial.
What are your objectives? Are they solely beneficial to you? If all of your aims are for your gain, your lady can foresee the future; you will be a very selfish person. How could any woman want to stay with you if you are a selfish person? Perhaps it’s okay for a satisfying, short-term relationship. You couldn’t offer her a sense of security; thus, you couldn’t have a solid long-term relationship with her. You must discover your life’s mission and accept responsibility for it.
What are your societal responsibilities? You must be clear and self-aware, as well as able to communicate with others. On the one hand, be lighthearted, and on the other, be serious. You’ve got both sides, and your lady might fall for you.
At the same time, avoid putting undue strain on the connection. Whether it was the start or the transition to the next stage, you may have felt uneasy and worried about losing your loved one, so you tried everything you could to keep the loved one with you. It’s the wrong mentality. Human beings are emotional while making decisions. Girl prefers to decide on her own rather than being pushed to make a quick decision. There is a choice to be made. The pressure to make decisions would be unbearable for everybody on the planet. Would you want to read my book if I forced you to do so? Certainly not. It’s a very different sensation if I say, “If you want to read my book or not, that’s your option,” and then you consider whether or not my book is valuable to you. Nobody wants to choose under compulsion. The word to remember is “freedom.” Allow your entire lady autonomy in deciding whether or not to stay with you. Don’t put any pressure on her; instead, let her choose you. It’s lovely to let things unfold spontaneously. Allow her to decide whether or not you are right for her. Don’t exert any pressure. Do not concentrate on your competitors; instead, focus on having a positive vibe.
I hope my book provides you with some useful information. If you enjoyed my essay, please tell your friends who might benefit from it. It enables you to be a more valuable person in both romantic and professional relationships. Make a friend with me and broaden your social circle.
Experience in software development, consulting services, and technical product management. Understanding of business and technology with an MBA in Finance and a Master's degree in Computer Science. Certified in AWS, GCP and Kubernetes with experience in building banking products from scratch and serving as a charismatic leader.